Showing posts with label feminism. Show all posts
Showing posts with label feminism. Show all posts

Monday, 19 August 2024

The undercurrents beneath the surface

Ullozhuku (Undercurrent, Malayalam; 2024)
Director: Christo Tomy


An old Tamil proverb goes, ‘Tell a thousand lies to make one marriage happen.’ In Indian society and most Eastern cultures, a person is highly encouraged to get married once he or she is of marriageable age. 

Before Bharat Matrimony and Shaadi.com came into the picture, the services of marriage brokers were often summoned. Like St Jude Thaddeus, the patron of the impossible and lost causes, the broker, armed with various biodata including age, educational status, skin fairness chart, horoscope, Varna, and juicy family scandals that needed to be suppressed, would come the most appropriate match. 

Like in game theory, both sides may have their bag of worms but would find it appropriate to keep them buried. After all, they would see the bigger picture. A married person reaches a certain elevated status in society. Even funeral rituals are slightly different for the unmarried.

With time, all these societal norms have changed. In matters of the heart, with urbanisation and girls coming out of their homes for jobs and education, romance took the wedding brokers out of a job. 

Coming from a Catholic family, the family flipped when they discovered their beloved daughter, Anju, was in love with Rajeev, a Hindu boy. They quickly get her married to Leelamma’s son, Thomaskutty. Soon after the marriage, Thomas becomes chronically ill with a brain condition. 

Frustrated living in a loveless marriage caring for her bedridden husband, she rekindles her liaison with her former lover. Under the guise of collecting her husband’s medicine from the hospital, she spends quality tryst-filled times with Rajeev. 

Thomas soon dies, but Anju discovers that she is pregnant. Leelamma finds out that she is involved in an affair. 
The crux of the rest of the story is how Anju tries to leave her mother-in-law to be with Rajeev. Contrary to what Anju had been made to understand, Thomas had been known to be sick even before the wedding, but Anju’s mother concealed this from her. 

A poignant drama depicting the relationship of a mother-in-law with her daughter-in-law. As a lady, Leelalamma feels that she has had a raw deal from God despite doing her part of her bargain to God. She thinks that God is jealous of her being happy. All her moments are short-lived. How she had to cut short her big dreams at 19 when she was drawn into matrimony. Then, she lost her husband and her sick adult son with an intractable disease. 

Against the wet background of a flood-ravaged village in Kuttanad, Kerala, amidst the rising and ebbing of floodwaters and pouring rain, the story tells the tale of undercurrents that the ladies had to endure to conform to society and fulfil their duties as daughters, wives, mothers, and God-fearing people. 


Tuesday, 8 August 2023

Barbie, a feminist icon?

Barbie (2023) Director: Greta Gerwig

There is a difference between fiction and reality. Like that, there is a stark difference between biology and sociology, between what one wants and what one gets, between doing good and receiving good things and between male and female. What started a plaything is now an icon of feminity?

Life used to be simpler. Boys would play with soldiers and girls with dolls. Maybe it is a realisation movie. The feminists, after fighting all these years for equal rights, against what they perceived as male toxicity or patriarchal thumping, are now realising that they had pushed their agenda too far. The feminist fight has gone too long. Some quarters will swear they have achieved more than they bargained for. Others will assert that they had already been liberated in the 7th century with the introduction of the latest Abrahamic religion, and there is nothing else to fight for anymore. Is Barbie really a feminist icon? Or are they merely another device to exploit people's gullibility to add to the umpteen wants they think they cannot live without? Barbie is if people did not realise, just a figment of one's imagination. It morphed from the inspiration of an adult-themed tabloid, Bild, named Bild Lilli. Lilli had been described as a 'pornographic caricature of a gold-digging exhibitionist and a floozy. In 1964, Mattel bought the copyrights to Bild Lilli, and its manufacturing in Germany ceased. Over the years, instead of empowering young girls, I think it gave young girls body dysmorphia issues.

Of course, over the years, Mattel tried to make Barbie inclusive by creating her line of dolls with themes of the marginalised and the handicapped and in keeping with the times to be inclusive, gender identity-wise. Mattel was happy to include them as more varieties would mean more children harassing their parents for more Barbie dolls.

The film is definitely not children's fare. With such sexual innuendos in its dialogue, it is far from a preteen movie. With a PG-13 rating, the target audience cannot be children. It must be aimed at the 90s kids who grew up with Barbie to know how they had been hoodwinked with a dream of a feminist icon which went too far.

Friday, 14 April 2023

A full circle?

Women Talking (2022)
(Based on a novel by Miriam Toews)
Director: Sarah Polley

"What's new?" said DA. "Women can talk; they sure do." He started talking about the male and female brain and how their connexions differ and such... One is action-orientated, whilst the other talks!" But that is not the point. It is about women's empowerment and talking back against a system that subjugated them to stereotypical roles. Every civilisation and religious path must have started with novel intentions of giving everyone a place in the sun and a right to pursue certain rights in life. Along the way, the leaders found it easier to rule by decree, and certain obscure divine ordains showed their presence.

Even though they are built tough and resilient on the inside, women lost out on many physical day-to-day duties and worked in tandem with their male counterparts to complete their tasks. Manual labour in the good old days was intensive. Mechanisation and industrialisation of the Sufferage era made work less labour-intensive. And finally, the sexual revolution of the 60s, for once, gave women, for the first time in aeons, a chance to control their fertility. All these while, parturition and child-rearing were their most significant hurdle in reaching greater heights. Maternal hormones and societal expectations prevented them from pursuing their worldly desires. 

With equal education and job opportunities, the past fifty years saw the fairer sex coming to par with their male counterparts. Their journey was no walk in the park. Their presence in education, economy and politics is beyond compare. Now, there is a re-look into their combative stance to be at par with men. Some have started asking questions. 

With all advances in contraceptive methods, failure is a real thing. Unfortunately, the by-product of all the sexual merriment is borne by the female gender. The maternal hormones circulating in their veins draw affection to the newborn or the soon-to-be-born. It is just simply impossible to detach oneself from this. A mother cannot just stand idle at the sound of a wailing baby. Neither can she prioritise her sleep over nursing her offspring at o'clock in the morning. Anyway, all the deferment of fertility to concentrate on career prospects in endangering childbirth at a mature age. With age, with wisdom, choosing a life partner becomes much more problematic. Single parenthood has its own problem. 

Again, some ask whether the biological differences in sex are for deservedly different reasons. Both perform various duties towards a unified front. One need not compete but rather complement the journey of life.

This film is based on a novel by Miriam Toews referring to what happened in a Mennonite colony named Manitoba Colony in Bolivia between 2005 and 2009. The Mennonites arose from the Anabaptist movement that emerged from the Reformation era. The Anabaptists believe baptism should be voluntary at a mature age, not infancy. 

The colony's 151 women and young girls were mass-sedated with cow tranquilisers and were sexually assaulted. More than seven were charged with rape, and so was the veterinarian who supplied the drug. The novel is a fictional account of what the affected women would have discussed before taking their next course of action.

This type of discussion going back and forth is what our forefathers must have had before leaving their lands and family in India, China or elsewhere. Even longer before that, when our first ancestor took his first step out of Africa. Quite recently, my daughter had to decide this before moving lock, stock and barrel to uproot from Malaysia and work under the NHS as a skilled immigrant labourer. They all must have considered the three choices - do nothing but forgive, forget and hope for the best, stay and fight, or leave.

With depleting national coffers while keeping the vote banks happy with race politics, civil service has taken a drastic deep in quality, efficacy and integrity.

[P.S. On another note... In the story, the ladies noticed that on the nights someone kept vigil, the said molestations did not occur. Gruesome assaults happened when everybody slept soundly. This reminded me of the double-slid experiments in quantum mechanics - results obtained with and without an observer, suggesting that everything is unreal.]

[P.S.S. Realising that humans need to live in a community and be herded to the correct path, which religion seems to offer, individuals prey on gullible victims to fulfil their desires.]



Thursday, 29 September 2022

Blood is thicker than water?

Gargi (கார்கி, Tamil; 2022)
Direction: Gautham Ramachandran
SonyLiv

This Tamil movie, which was simultaneously dubbed in many Indian languages at its release, is creating waves and boasts of being one of recent most interesting legal dramas. It has a gripping story, a believable storyline with down-to-earth court scenes, excellent acting and veiled social messages to match.

When someone close to us gets entangled with the wrong end of the law, we tend to side with our loved ones. At no time would we waver from our stance but to stand behind them and assert that they have been wronged. Our blinkers refuse to make us see beyond what we want to see. We know what we want to believe. We refuse to see the bigger picture. Just how far would we go with that? A case in point that comes to mind is repeated negative messages from a particular convicted ex-PM's daughter's social media handles.

A love-smitten primary school teacher, Gargi, is full of smiles. Her life is set. Her beau is so much in love with her, and wedding bells are in the air. Everything came crashing down when a 10-year-old girl was raped. Besides four other ruffians, Gargi's aged father, who works as a security officer in the apartment complex, is the fifth suspect. Very soon, she realises that she is out alone in a world that is not only so cold but violently hostile. 

The vulture-like attitude of the press becomes clear. In their ferocious appetite to tease the news, nothing seems sacrosanct. The neighbours and the rest of the general public are quick to cast their judgmental eyes and are not so civil with their caustic comments. The full trial by the media determines that the suspect is guilty even before the charge is filed. Gargi is advised to flee town with her mother and pre-teen sister. Even her fiancé is suggesting she run away from all these kerfuffles. 

Gargi Vachaknavi in the Veda. She is one of the
epitomai of the high stature of women in ancient 
India. She was Brahma Rishi, a celibate debater 
in the court of King Janaka, circa 700BCE. She 
remains the world's oldest feminine icon in 
ancient Hinduism. 
Gargi's mother's dosa flour home business comes to a grinding halt. The sister cannot go to school, and Gargi is soon sacked. No lawyer wants to defend her father due to public pressure; san a mature shy newbie lawyer with a stuttering problem and no experience defending anyone before.

Now Gargi has to take charge. She knows that her father cannot be guilty of the crime. After all, he saved her from near molestation by a teacher. It was also he who told her to stand tall to fight for herself.

The rest of the story is about Gargi and her not-so-experienced lawyer trying to get the father out on bail and doing their own investigations to unravel some ugly truths. 

Inserted with the storyline are many social easter eggs waiting for film geeks to pick up. Kudos to the many powerful inserted every now and then. Women empowerment is given prominence here. Again and again, the female characters are reminded to assert themselves. Victory seems to be seen when the pre-teen sister attains menarche, and Gargi need not tell her the dos and don'ts as a girl. 

The judge presiding over this rape case is a transgender. When the Public Prosecutor heckles the judge on the side of her gender when her ruling is not in his favour, she retorted, "I know the arrogance of men and the pain of a woman!"

The story is not lopsided, painting characters neither black nor white. Everybody has his flawed side and his weak moments. Overall, highly recommended. 4.5/5.

Wednesday, 22 September 2021

Blame it on the State; nobody takes any responsibility anymore!

Mare of Easttown (Miniseries, Season 1; 2021)
HBO

Even though this miniseries has been showered with praises and accolades for its outstanding storyline and exciting characterisation, I cannot stop thinking of the society it depicts. Sadly, such dysfunctional families are the norm and maybe a prescient occurrence in the near foreseeable future.

Mare @ Marianne Sheehan is a detective in the local police department in a small town in Pennsylvania. So many things are playing in her mind. Her adult son had recently hung himself. His toddler son, Mare's grandson, is under her care as his mother, Mare's daughter-in-law, is institutionalised for drug addiction. Mare's teenage daughter is angry with her for her brother's death, while Mare's ex-husband, living just behind her home, is getting engaged. Meanwhile, Mare's mother, who stays with her, breathes down her neck, critical of her every move.

At the work front, things are not looking too rosy either. A one-year unresolved case of a missing girl is making its rounds in the media again, and a new murder of a young teenage mother takes centre stage. Since it is a small town, many of the people she knew were somehow implicated or have to clear themselves in the murder inquiry.

On a personal level, her close friends become murder suspects one by one. There is so much of falling in love, out of love and affairs in the town that it looks like everybody is or has been linked romantically at one point or another. Many youngsters there are psychologically disturbed and yearn to find an outlet for their perceived 'stress of modern living'. Even Mare, a grandmother, is hot on the trail of the dating scene as two men woo her to be their beau.

I could not help but wonder what brought society to this - a culture so confused and struggling with its day-to-day handling of life. It is not just Tinseltown's picturisation of an imagined family. It very much portrays reality. Someone was commenting on this topic recently. 

Between the beginning of the 20th century all through the 1960s, the  USA was considered the most powerful nation in the world. The country was endowed with very working citizens and immigrants who were one-minded in wanting to progress in life. They followed the mantra of holding his ambition as his sole purpose in life and work towards this end. He had his set of rules to follow, and he took responsibility for all his actions. The State did not interfere with his day-to-day living. A man's failure is his own, no fault of others, and nobody is going to bail him out. At the end of the day, this man did well. Even if he did not reach the stars, he did at least the Moon.

A few things derailed this arrangement. Firstly, it is the demand for rights. Everybody felt that it was their divine right to the entitlement of some basic needs in life. The desire to do whatever they wanted was enshrined. And the State became a Nanny to ensure it is carried out. If one wants to have a child outside the confines of marriage, it is her right. The State will intervene to offer financial and social support. The enforcement arms of the State will ensure it is done.

Secondly, contraception liberated society from the hustle of worrying about the sequelae of coitus. They had been freed sexually. They were in control of reproductive power. So they thought. They did not realise that contraceptive failure was a reality and had to be dealt with. Again came the State to help out. But what about emotional support when needed? Society's morality code that fit an agrarian society had changed to accommodate of industrialised one.

In 1950, when Ingrid Bergmann was riding high as the silver screen diva, known for her fabulous screen presence in Casablanca, was denied a visa to the USA. She was Swedish, had just done 'Stromboli' and had an affair with her Italian director, Roberto Rossellini. The illicit union produced offspring. Bergmann was denied entry on this account - a person of such stature, potentially influencing the doe-eyed fans with had dressing and morality, was a bad example to the then conservative American. The American Movie Industry had strict moral codes after the Roaring twenties, which led to the Prohibition Era. 

Things have indeed changed now. Look at the public rallying behind Britney Spears fighting her Conservatorship. In that case, her father had petitioned the Courts for guardianship. Because of her bipolar disease, he feels she is incapable of controlling her finances and making appropriate decisions of her fecundity. See the rallying cry behind Spears; they say it is her life. As if the elements of Nature are dutybound to bear the brunt of our follies!


With the human rights movement and the need for individual expressionism came feminism. Rather than toeing in line with the preset social mores, they demand rights. The right to stand alone, without the significant support by their side, plays victimhood for all society's past bullying and demand reparations. Unfortunately, the Universe does not work that way. It is indeed the union of the Male and Female cosmic energies that maintain the equilibrium of the celestial bodies.

Tuesday, 17 August 2021

Can anyone really be free?

Black Widow (2021)

Everybody talks about wanting to be free, free from any encumbrances, free to say and do as he pleases, free as a bird to move around. The caged dog looks at his stray counterpart on the other side of the fence with contempt for the freedom that he enjoys. On the other hand, the stray longs for the time when he does not have to scratch his head looking for his next meal.

We think we are free by living with our loved ones or within communities that we find commonalities. Sad to say that even within societies, certain norms and mores exist that one is excepted to conform to. Challenges are bound to happen with the members in the spring of their youth; the young feel restricted with educational exposure. They want to be free of any restrictive chains that bog them down.

Like it or not, it is not easy. Wilfully or not, we are tied down. A society is paved towards a particular direction by the instructions laid down by the majority. To reach greater heights, these laid laws need to be progressive in keeping with the changing times and their corresponding challenges. One cannot hope one archaic rule to apply to the end of times.

The Black Widow story is set before Avengers: Endgame, where Black Widow sacrificed herself trying to undo Thanos' snapping of fingers. It starts with Natasha Romanoff's (Black Widow) childhood in 1995 Ohio. She discovers that her parents had to flee to Cuba to escape arrest by the authorities. She soon discovers that her parents are Russian sleepers in the USA and that her family is just a front for espionage. In Cuba, Natasha's father (Red Guardian - Russia's answer to Captain America) is apprehended by Dreykov. Melina, her mother, is inducted as a chief scientist in the Red Room to research the mind. Natasha and her sister, Yelena, are enrolled on the Black Widow programme to churn out efficient lean, mean mind-controlled female assassins.


Along the course, Natasha escapes, join SHIELD and becomes a fugitive. When apprehending a rogue Black Widow, Yelena is sprayed with Red Dust, which removes her from the clutches of the Red Room mind control.

The rest of the story involves Yelena joining forces with Natasha to break their father from prison, influence their mother to reveal the location of the Red Room and destroy Dreykov to free all the Black Widows.

The word here is free. In the post-credit scene, we are told that Natasha had died, killed by Hawkeye. So, Yelena falls into the trap of Contessa Valentina Allegra de la Fontaine (Val) to avenge her sister's death. So much for being free. It looks like Yelena, like a Black Widow who was under the control of Dreykov before now, maybe under the thumb of possibly HYDRA.

Interestingly, HYDRA believes that humanity cannot be trusted with freedom. When freedom is taken away, they resist. Wars have taught them that humans become most resourceful, efficient and laborious under pressure. Hence, humanity has to surrender its freedom willingly. Sometimes it needs to be done without their realisation.

(P.S. This is a through and through a feminist movie. Almost every assassin, sharpshooters, armoured henchmen (who could be women) and the main characters are female. The theme of freedom and removal of ovaries hint at such an agenda. The male characters are weak. Look at the almost drunk-like Red Guardian and Natasha's sidekick/love interest Rick Mason who yearns for her approval by bending backwards to get the things she wants.)

Tuesday, 29 June 2021

The naked truth about gender equality!

Soni (Hindi, 2018)
Direction: Ivan Ayr


I always thought that having female-only buses and trains are steps in the wrong direction. We seem to be going back to the dark ages when members of the fairer sex were preferably not seen and not heard. Not only they were handed the dubious title of the root of sins, but they were also killed at birth. Even though we like to think that the ignorant era of jahiliyyah is over, in reality, it is anything but done with.

On the other spectrum, we have people who insist that gender is fluid, that gender expression (identity) is a social construct. They posit that gender is a continuum between masculine and feminine, can vary with time and is different from sexual orientation (attraction). 

Gender studies started as an interdisciplinary academic field to improve female representation in public life and pursue women's equality. Of late, however, the emphasis is more on LGBTQA+ issues rather than fulfilling their original objective, which, sadly, remains unfinished. The world is more interested in getting unisex toilets and giving the right to an individual to change his gender at will (e.g. transwomen)!

In their day-to-day life, the reality on the ground is that despite all the empowerment they have been given over the years, it is far from satisfactory. The slow-moving movie, minus all glitz and pomp often associated with Bollywood film, tells us how women get a raw deal in society. At the centre of the story is Soni, a police sub-inspector. She seems to have gotten through a rough patch with her boyfriend and lives alone in a rented flat. Her neighbour is a nosy but caring older lady who had her way of warding unwelcomed attention from roving eyes of male eyes in her younger days. She wore a sindoor even though she is Muslim. The vermillion gave her protection. Soni is working under a kind female IPS officer who has problems of her own. Working in a male dominant force is no bed of roses. Add that to harassment from VIPs and politicians, at the home front, she is constantly reminded of her ticking biological clock.


Even though the force has assigned the power to Soni to uphold the law, she feels inadequate. The thugs only look at her sex, not the authority that she carries. Even her boyfriend feels she needs his presence to ward off the unsavoury crowd.

It is not all feminism in your face for viewers. In between the story, the screenwriter tells how ladies utilise their so-called vulnerable position for their advantage. A female tenant who is on arrears with her rental accused her landlord of molesting her. She thought she could get away from paying her outstanding rent. Sometimes the weak use their victimhood to their advantage.

Rather than just demanding and demanding more rights for women, advocates for women empowerment should call for a societal change in mindset. It is said that the aetiology of treating women as second class citizens starts with the family itself. Mothers treat their sons as their prized possession and their daughter playing second fiddle to the family needs. Mothers are told to knock in the idea into their sons the female gender need to be respected by example. And Bollywood has its hands tainted for picturising females as objects that need replacement ever so often, whilst the male actors still perform as heroes even at 70. The love interests, however, are young enough to be their granddaughters. 

Saturday, 24 April 2021

Make or break!

Gauri
There it was, another family celebration and another tête-à-tête with my favourite uncle. Whilst the rest were immersed in their revelry, we were pretty engaged in our own private discourse - with him looking for someone to impart his 85-year old life experiences, and I, just listening and sometimes trying to tease more out of him. This time around, we discussed the role of the significant other in the family, among many things. This post is what transpired out of that.

They say that behind every man's success, there is a woman. Many are quick to quip that behind their every fall, there is another, the other woman. Women have the uncanny ability to create as well as to destroy.


With the biological assets that they are endowed with, they can create, nurture and sustain life with their tenacity and ever-embracing progestogenic demeanour, like a mother hen, able to hide her chicklings under my wings away from the prancing eagle. And they will protect their little ones with the last scratch of their claw from hissing predator snake.

Mahishasura Mardini.

They can choose what they want. They can be Gauri, the epitome of peace and happiness comparable to the bosom of a mother, the all-embracing embodiment of calmness and purity, depicted by the all-white attire and an equally composed vehicle, the saintly cow. As Gauri, she plays the role of peacemaker, a rock of hope and anchor to hold an institution steady to traverse the uncertainties of life.

When the situation warrants, she needs to assume the role of Mahishasura Mardini, the slayer of the buffalo demon, Mahishasura, who, with the boon of indestructibility, terrorised the Universe. She took this fiercest form of Durga, with the Trident of Siva, to bring equilibrium to the system.

It may appear that the illustrative embodiment of shakti, female power, can act unilaterally with no control without the need for its counterpart, the male energy, Shiva. Not really. Harmony is achieved with the inclusion of both powers. Notice that Shiva's representation appears in both Gauri and Durga form of the female divinity - Trident, to protect and attack. Unbridled power, it seems, is also counterproductive.

Kaali
Remember the instance of Kaali, intoxicated with the taste of blood and energy of invincibility, she was on a rampage. Only Shiva could pacify her. His prostration in her path subdued her. In embarrassment, she let her tongue out, more of an admission of mistake rather than an intimidating posture. This tongue-letting image is often depicted as that of fearsome Kaali. In reality, it is not.

It takes two to tango. Both parties have to nimble and agile to produce an eye-soothing display of this Spanish light-spirited variety of flamenco.



Wednesday, 21 April 2021

Within a generation?

Zindagi inShorts (Hindi, 2020)
Netflix

This is a collection of seven short stories, just nice for light viewing and those with a short attention span. It covers a myriad of topics, with women empowerment taking centre stage. In the first episode titled 'Pinni', a housewife with exceptional culinary expertise is only appreciated for her cooking skills but not for anything else. She is just viewed as a doormat - it is there to serve a purpose, but there is no need to go fancy about it. She strikes back when her husband got no time to remember her birthday.

'Sleeping partner' narrates how a woman's role is miniaturised in a family. She rebels by expressing her sexual freedom. See how she hits back when her lover starts blackmailing her. The story touches on marital rape. 'Sunnyside Upar' cajoles us to live out the only life given to us to its fullest via the experience of a young doctor in a cancer ward. Bad things happen to good people. Just deal with it. 'Nano so phobia' brings on the plight of a lonely elderly Farsi lady who has had once too many times cried wolf to be taken seriously. 'Chhaju ke Dahi Bhalle' shows how culturally close people from Lahore and Amritsar are. Through a dating app, a Muslim girl links up with a Sikh boy. After the pleasantries, they decided to meet up at a popular eatery. After failing to meet up, they realised that they were on either side of the India-Pakistan border.

'Thappad' is a story of empowerment where an adolescent sister with her younger brother stands up against bullies. 'Swaha' is a comical rendition of an insecure husband and supposed two-timing or three-timing wife. 

It is all well and fine that more and more women are finding their places in societies. Rightly they prosper from the opportunities that were denied from them earlier due to changing societal mores. The problem is that the rebel yell for change may be happening much too rapid than it can be handled by society. It seems that the morphing of female assertations is too drastic for their counterpart and the rest of the family unit. Like a single hard slap on the face before they can realise what hit them, things have morphed within a single generation. From the demure social norms abiding mums, they have metamorphosised to groundbreaking boardroom-chairing giant figures waiting to change the world. 

Herein lies the friction. Biologically, both sexes have their respective roles in societies. They are meant to complement each other, not compete against one another. The union of the male and female forces are interdependent. The energies of Siva and Parvathi are best when working in unison. The unabated individual force would only lead to self-destruction.

Let us look at the family unit. It has become acceptable these days that it is perfectly normal for a family unit to be led by a single parent. This does not, however, concur with the findings of many social researchers. They have linked poor students' academic achievements, high incidences of delinquencies, substance abuses, teenage pregnancies and its ensuing problems to single parenthood. A proper father figure and motherly touch seem essential in wholesome parenting.

The dominant role of the male in the family system has eroded. The traditional role of a strong protector and provider has somehow evolved. They are expected to appear strong and confident only on the outside for a picture-perfect display for the public. Within the four walls, they are expected to be emotionally dependent and easily be wrapped around the strings of their apron. But then, apron neither denotes feminine nor docility. When a male does not embrace this arrangement, he is deemed to exhibit masculine toxicity. That is dealt with by cancelling!

“Be afraid. Be very afraid.”*