Life is a battlefield!

My body and mind went overdrive as things typically do while partaking in one of those age-defying mindless Sunday morning recreational run-cycle-run combo of Powerman Malaysia 2023 Edition. Staying mindful of the traffic flow of fellow madmen, the condition of the roads, my heart rate, race timing, the remaining distance to cover and gears, I had my hands figuratively full on top of everything else I was doing.

Behind it all, buffering silently in the background, basking in the inebriation of all sanguineous perfusion of flurry vascular tributaries is the creative part of the brain. It wants to keep up with the rest of the body. It, too, tries its hand at neuroplasticity. It sprouts out dendrites to establish long-lost connexions. And it engages in its internal soliloquy. I just happened to be there eavesdropping the murmur. 

Life is a battlefield. In modern times, the enemies we are supposed to fight are no longer the co-creations created in His image but the one in the mirror. The demons have all gone internal, so we tell ourselves. The jihad that they were fighting to steamroll our ideology has gone underground. Now, it seems jihad refers to fighting the inner demons.

Now, we are supposed to be kind to each other, come together and feel alright. We are not supposed to be having ill feelings towards the other. Instead of all these, we should focus on fighting the inner demons that lurk within us. Then there will be heaven on Earth. 

In real life, it does not work this way. In Nature, there is a constant need to push to a higher level. It is a question of the survival of the fittest. Darwin proposed it. We condemned it but cannot sweep the reality under the carpet. 

Even as a newbie starts cycling, running or trekking, he always tries to keep up with the group's oldest and weakest link. If he can reach the stage when he can outperform the slowest of the pack, he knows he has qualified to be a legitimate fellow group participant. 

You are given one life, not to brood over but to make the best

despite all the seemingly unending adversities that come and 

go. Sisyphus, given the life sentence of rolling the boulder up

the hill will have to find joy in reaching the pinnacle, 

knowing very well that the boulder will roll down and he has to

repeat the process again and again.

When training for a competition, a participant has to train with someone stronger than himself to improve. During the actual event, he has to benchmark himself against the better ones if he were to outdo himself. There is no meaning in merely pushing ourselves to improve without a yardstick to follow. In competitive mode, we look for prey, the feared 'the other' and the potentially beatable. We want to improve our standing by overtaking others, one at a time.

There is a place for active competition. The world is cruel and does not give concessions to the weak. So, affirmative action will work only in a short time. When used indiscriminately, it would be counterproductive. Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And weak men create hard times. (G. Michael Hopf)

Like it or not, we improve as a human race by challenging the status quo. Jealousy can be a healthy virtue as long as to push oneself, but not in destruction. But he would be devastated, nevertheless. As long as he knows, he will return bigger and stronger. 

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See you at the end of the road!

Nomadland (2020)
Director, Screenplay, Co-producer: Chloè Zhao

Maybe we never forgot our roots. Even though we decided to become farmers, stay put in one place and hope to gain strength through numbers (i.e. living in communities), we simply could not shake off our desires to wander and be close to Nature. As cavemen and hunter-gatherers, we were doing the same thing. We were awed by the things around us. We wanted to experience them and to know all about the fantastic things that we saw and felt. Who built them? When were these made?  Like an excited child, we yearned for answers. And we are still doing them today. 

At one time, we were told it is what it is. Do not ask too many questions of which answers you will not understand. It is beyond your comprehension, they would say. Nah, read these scriptures; everything is there. With science, it appears that this mindset is changing. People started asking questions and more question. Apparently, there were more questions than answers the more people asked. Curiosity piqued. Obviously, the books did not have all the answer. It seems that people need to feel to experience. They needed to spread their wings. The desire to travel is rekindled.

Much like a physical journey, our life journey gives us pockets of experiences. Every visual gratification, every smell, every touch, every feeling is an experience of its own. In life, we would encounter many sweet-bitter events. All these pockets of experiences form a composite picture of what we can say 'our life'.

'Nomadland' can be viewed as a cerebral movie that tries to look at two things that seem essential to the American public - homelessness and the zest to find the meaning of life. In a way, this film combines both topics. 

Chloè Zhao

Many townships that had experienced boomtown for decades are now in real danger of being wiped off the USA map. The industries and factories which formed the rock bed of their existence have suddenly lost their competitiveness. Many of the work had been outsourced to third world countries. Town dwellers had to find employment elsewhere. One such town in this story is Empire in Nevada. Fern, the protagonist, is one of the last people to leave this town after its Gypsum plant shuts down, and her husband dies. She sells her belongings to invest in a van to travel, see the world, and seek employment. 

In the course of her journey, she meets many fellow travellers who consider themselves 'nomads', making trying to escape the restrictive lives that they were leading or to cut loose of the melancholy that suffocate them. 

Perhaps by being out in the open amongst the gargantuan structures and mighty forces of nature, all our troubles seem insignificant. To the vast expanse of the Universe, we, as individuals, are irrelevant in the greater scheme of things. We are nothing, so are what we perceive as our unsolvable miseries.

Chloè Zhao has the enviable reputation of being the first woman of colour and the second woman to win the coveted 'Best Director' award at the Oscars. But, unfortunately, her native country, China, had censored all of her, the 2021 Oscar, as well as her acceptance. This is in response to her caustic remark about China in a 2013 interview. She had described China as a 'place where there are lies everywhere'.

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Will love keep us together, forever?

Minari ('Water Celery' American-Korean, English; 2021)

Written and Directed: Lee Isaac Chung

Most immigrants stories harbour melodrama which relies so heavily on wanting to play the victim card. They often portray their hosts as dysfunctional and that the pathetic immigrants are bullied and blamed for things that are no fault of theirs. Well, this one is different.

They left their motherland because it was too complicated there. Life in their newfound land is no leisure cruise either, they soon discover. Spending hours looking at chicken backside for the onerous task of chicken sexing is not cerebrally stimulating, but it pays the bill. When Jacob decides to move from California to the Ozark Land (Arkansas) for farming, his wife, Monica, thinks he is bonkers. With a young teenage girl to groom and a 'hole in the heart' stricken tween boy who needs regular medical attention, Monica is sceptical of the whole endeavour's success. Maternal Grandma, Soonja, is summoned from Korea to help to mind the kids. Herein starts a problem. The kids do not look at Soonja as Grandma material. She does not speak English and does not tell stories.

Monica, the religious of the two, hopes to find solace in the church and its congregants. Their first attendance proved an inconvenience as they could not fit into the mostly white crowd. Jacob getting along with his farming with the help of a war veteran, Paul, who himself is pretty fanatical with his religiosity.

Jacob feels that all life challenges can be met with sheer human intelligence, whereas his wife believes that God's grace guides us. So, when drought hits the land and he cannot get customers for his produce, the couple has to make tough decisions about their marriage.

Are decisions in a marriage a compromise? Is love strong enough an anchor to steer the metaphorical family ship through the storm? Can traditional teachings and intangible beliefs provide a bedrock in bringing everyone together to weather hurdles in life?

A sober, slow-moving movie tackles many immigrants' issues in a subtle, unhurried and non-condescending way.

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It is the journey.

Harold and Maude (1971)

Some look at life as full of doom and gloom, as a purposeless one. Whichever path one takes, we know what the final destination is, and the path leading to it can be paved with shrapnel and pain. Nietzschean and many existentialist philosophers perpetuate this idea. On the other end of the spectrum, others whose sole purpose of life is to savour the joy of being born as a human being push it to the tilt. They view the boon of birth as a gift on a platter to enjoy with no boundaries.

The truth must be lying somewhere in between - between nihilism and hedonism. There must be a purpose in our existence, perhaps to somehow leave a tiny mark of legacy, no matter how small, in a small way to propel our loved ones, family or community forward. A community, hence a country, is, after all, is made of subunits of families. So, improvements in families will sequentially propel the human race forward. 

We should probably get our cues about life from the words of the Stoics and Epicureans. In their minds, we have only this one life to do what we can whilst finding pleasure within all of the aches and pains it has to offer.

This 1971 film, made at the end of the time of flower power, must have been an assessment of the liberal care-free perception of society versus the traditional convention-abiding outlook of the community. It was a satire of society we live in, which involves 'groupthink' as determined by authoritative figures - religion, psychology, family, military.

This cult-following offering recently celebrated its 50th anniversary. It is a dark comedy about a death-obsessed 19-year-old young man who falls in love with a happy-go-lucky 80-year old lady. Yes, 80 years old.  Harold, brought up in a privileged background by a narcissistic single mother, grows bored with life. He is preoccupied with death and religiously attends funerals, even of unknown people, just to be closer to death. He has a warped sense of humour, sometimes faking himself hanging or cutting off his own limb. His mother's attempts at keeping him entertained with gifts and new girlfriends proved futile.

So Harold found himself quite at home with a chance meeting with Maude at a random funeral. Her care-less attitude and total disregard for the rule of law excited him. Their little escapade turned out to be a sort of coming-of-age phase for Harold as Maude shows him all the small things that make one appreciate the reason for living. Harold looks at funerals as the final destination we are all edging to as Maude looked at them as a moment to reflect the time of their existence. I guess the film's message is to accept death as an essential and inevitable recurring process that regenerates life.

The memorable scene in this movie is the one in a field of daisies. Maude said she would like to change to a sunflower most of all as they are so tall and simple. Harold replied that he would like to be one of the daises because "they are all alike". Maude turned to Harold and explained that they are not.  

"Some are smaller, some are fatter. Some grow to the left, some to the right. Some even have lost some petals. All kinds of observable differences". Harold could suddenly see the truth in her observation. The camera pans way back to show that Harold and Maude were standing in a graveyard. The gravestones were identical to the daises in one perspective. Even though the stones were all carved to look similar, they signify different lives lived - happy, sad, abrupt, or long. But the ending, the final destination, nevertheless, is the same.

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On paternal love...

Aelay (ஏலே! Hey You! Tamil; 2021)

We always complain that our fathers are not expressive enough, that they are not touchy enough. We allege that they are relatively economical with their display of affection. We despise their approach to solving problems. We say they are too laid back, sometimes also detached.  In our minds, our fathers exhibit all the traits of how a father should not be. We resolve to be just the opposite of what they were.

We spend a great deal of our adulthood not seeing eye-to-eye with our fathers. We tell ourselves we will not be like him when we grow older. Slowly, with the lessons learnt from the School of Hard Knock and Life, we soon realise that he managed, with and despite his knowledge and experience, to hold the fort for others to prosper. In the traditional sense, he looked at himself as a material provider. As for their deeds and misdeeds that he has under his belt, they cannot be held against as he did with his family's best interest at heart. As for vices, he is, after all, human. It is for him to err and for us to forgive.

We should not forget that our parents have to fulfil a particular personal obligation to merit their existence. They also may have likes, desires and sometimes guilty pleasures. Their sole purpose of being is not just to procreate and nurture their progeny. 

Parthi returns home to fulfil his filial duties at his father's funeral. He never a good relationship with his father. His father, a widower, brought him and his sister up working as an ice cream vendor. He was quite a character in his younger days, dodging moneylender and conning people of their monies to earn some extra cash. Parthi grew up hating covering up his father's antic, and he thought his father was quite an embarrassment.

At the funeral, Parthi realised that he had no tears for his father's demise. Unbeknownst to everyone, the father is just up to one of his tricks again - faking his own death to claim insurance! Amidst all this mayhem, Parthi's hears that his childhood is getting married. Parthi's father, meanwhile, is puzzled why his son feels no sorrow. 

Their backstory is told in flashbacks, and the ongoing story describes how Parthi tries to appreciate his father's struggles. The father's foolhardy comes to light, but only to die for real—an entertaining movie without much of the mainstream cinema's glitz performed by new actors. 

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Equality, an unachievable dream?

City Of God (Malayalam, 2011)
Director: Lilo Jose Pullissery 

This film may mean different things to different people. Some may look at characters from four stories getting intertwined in the course of their lives. The storyteller tells the story in flashbacks and hyperlinks that finally paint a composite picture.

Basically, it can be divided into two main stories; one involving an immigrant Tamil unskilled workers in Kochin and their daily dealings, the other related to a group of rich and famous concerning an up and coming actress, her entourage and a tiff with a particular developer over a piece of land.  When we look closely, both parties are no different from each other; they consume alcohol, indulge in carnal pleasures putting aside social mores, and are involved in criminal activities.

The affluent side somehow can do their unkosher pursuits without invoking too much fanfare with their affluence. Somehow the wheel of justice and enforcement can be wrapped around their fingers with their wealth and influence. They can literally get away with murder. They are no paragons of virtue, not much different from their economically-challenged counterpart.

However, the whole might of the enforcement befalls upon the non-wealthy. To top it up, their social behaviours are closely scrutinised by the community itself. Morality restrictions are clamped upon them. The name of God and ancestral traditions are used towards this end. It seems that chastity laws only apply to the disadvantaged, not the well-heeled. 

(P.S. Not to be confused with the Brazilian 2002 movie 'City of God' about brutal gang wars in Rio de Janeiro's poor neighbourhoods. It seems everyone thinks their country is chosen by God. Keralites refer to their state as God's own country whilst Rio de Janeiro has the mammoth soapstone structure of Christ the Redeemer overlooking its city.)

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It is a zoo out there!

Oh, dear, oh, dear!

First, there were the vultures, perched high up on the branch waiting patiently for their preys to fall. Their spirits rise with every heaving of the chest, hoping that that would be the last. Is the soul protected by the soaring eagles seen way up in the skies? Even as the body is failing, the spirit is clinging and refuses to go.

Even as the remains remain warm, White Rabbit is already scurrying around, muttering, "Oh dear, oh dear. I'm late for an important date!" peeking at the watch ever so often. The Mad Hatter is not needed, but he likes to think that he is indispensable.

Are the hyenas' scream decibels too loud for comfort? Mourners want a time of peace to reflect, not hear noises that evoke madness.

Minesweeper

Then came the owls with their eyes opened so vast that they scrutinise every shortcoming and scrouge source material for their next gossip session. With stereoscopic vision and 360° movement of the cervical region, they manage to recce every nook and corner like a minesweeper.

Also present are the almost unnoticeable storks that stand quietly by the corner in a deep thinker's pose. They seem invisible, practically camouflaged with the background, unflinching and disappearing as quietly as they moved in.

Buridan's Ass

The ostriches would not want to see any of these. They are content with burying their heads in the sand, convincing themselves that everything will pass. Like an albatross, the guilt of the whole preceding events is wrapped around some people's necks.

Almost forgotten are the philosopher asses who are quick to whip out philosophical pearls of wisdom. They peruse the exhibited cadaver and highlight the futility of life. They remind that the departed remain a pale shadow of her flamboyant self with all the juices of life sapped dry. They lecture on how we, the living, scream for recognition, pride and inflate our egos with hedonistic desires. 

Seeing with complex eyes?

Like a student of Camus or Nietsche, they paint a nihilistic purpose of life and plead for humility and simplicity. Even before the listeners can digest the gist of the speech, these same mules start arguing that they are right and throwing the weights around to show who is the boss! So much for walking the talk.

I just rest idly like a fly on the wall. I fancy looking at myself like a mysterious lizard who play dead and listen intently to the conversations. Sometimes I think it is quietly mocking the speakers by periodically clicking at the end of the sentences. And the humans respond as if they had received a divine nod of approval.

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Eight limbed alien being?

My Octopus Teacher (Documentary, 2020)
Netflix

During my childhood, one of the highlights was watching Jacques Cousteau's documentary on ocean exploration aboard his research vessel, Calypso. Week after week, he would have different ocean regions to showcase a kaleidoscopic kingdom hidden beneath sea level. Funny, it appeared so picturesque even though we viewed them on a rackety black-and-white television! I knew then that Costeau was the pioneer in ocean exploration and is also credited for modernising the scuba gear. It was amazing how much time he spent looking at marine life and narrating them.

'My Octopus Teacher' reminds me of Costaeu's film, just that this time around, it is displayed in 4K ultra-high-resolution display and excellent sound systems. The cinematography is to die for, and the presentation opens up the mind to look at lower lifeforms with respect. 

The narrator, a burnt-out filmmaker, Craig Foster, retreats to his childhood home in Cape Town for some peace of mind. He started diving in a chilly bay off the Atlantic Ocean. He discovers a world of small oceanic creatures and builds a common octopus fascination (Octopus Vulgaris).

In his 300 over days of diving into the shallow lake, the viewers learn more about the intricate ecological system that lives there. Foster observes a particular octopus and films its behaviour regularly. Slowly the octopus built the confidence to come near him and nibble his finger with its tentacles. 

I never knew that a film on a cephalopod can be so emotionally wrecking. Craig watches his mate as she (it turns out to a female) go about life, changing its colour to suit its environment, feed on preys and protect itself from predators. Craig has a strict policy not to interfere with nature. Hence, when the octopus was once attacked and had one of its tentacles severed off, he started questioning whether what he did was indeed the right thing to do.

Miraculously, the octopus' tentacle grew back eventually, and it went on to mate. The thing about octopuses is that becoming pregnant is like a death sentence. When the time is ripe, the female will impregnate itself with a sash of spermatozoa deposited into its body. It guards its eggs 24/7 without feeding and drains itself to the brink of death. At the end of incubation, which would be about a month, it would be too weak to defend itself and fall easy prey to natural predators.

The octopus is an interesting animal. It is a mollusc under the class of Cephalopoda just like squids, cuttlefish and nautiloids. It is said to carry a too high number of neurons for its size. For comparison, Octopus Vulgaris, has about 500 million neurons, five times the number in a hamster, and approaches the number in the common marmoset, a kind of monkey. (Humans have about 86 billion.) Because of this and the snippets seen in this documentary, it appears as though the octopus shows emotional responses, scientists wonder if octopuses have consciousness.

It is also a highly intelligent organism. It learns tricks quickly, and the puzzling thing is how it cracks open the snail's shell at the precise point to incapacitate it. 

There is a theory that octopuses are no worldly creatures at all. Part of its DNA is alien and had reached Earth with a comet. The DNA fused with the squid but eventually got its own life. It is a master at disguise and Paul, the Octopus, in the 2010 World Cup, had shown the world that they are football enthusiast and good animal oracle when he correctly predicted the eventual Cup winner.

(P.S. Heard a podcast about marine scientists accounts of their years of observation of a particular deep-sea octopus. Hear it below.)

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