The reality of addiction

Requiem for a Dream (2000)
Director: Darren Aronofsky

The President of India, a rocket scientist and an overall good soul, once told his audience, "Dream is not that which you see while you sleep, but is that something that does not allow you to sleep." Don't jump about it; put it in action!

They also discuss the American dream, which states everyone has equal opportunity to achieve success and prosperity through hard work, determination, and initiative.

Yes, we can convince ourselves that we can do it. We should go for it, putting our minds and souls into it. However, the fact is that people win and people lose. Only some people are cut for it. A thin line exists between having the mojo to do it and not. One should recognise their shortcomings and jump on to Plan B, not forever flogging a dead horse.

Worse still, when one fails to pick up the telltale signs, one buries oneself deeper and deeper into a cesspool of self-defeating habits, hoping for a miracle to happen. When the going gets tough, one should know when it is time to get the tough going, when to retreat and live to fight another day. Failure to discern will spell disaster.

But how do we know our capability if we do not know ourselves to the limit? How do we know our breaking point unless we are stretched to the limit? The telltale sign must be when pharmacological agents get involved. Where does the concoction of ayahuasca with active ingredients like DMT (Dimethyltryptamine) and MAOIs (Monoamine oxidase inhibitors) fit in? Ayahuasca is a potent hallucinogen used to open portals inaccessible to human minds to explore one's true potential. Many ultra-marathoners in the desert of Mexico consume it to push their bodies to the possible human limits. 

Some have labelled this movie as one of the most disturbing films ever produced. It is not so much of the gore factor at play here; it is much the depiction of hopelessness one experiences when one is trapped in an addiction.

Loneliness, depersonalisation and self-prescribing are the greatest bane of modern living. Human interaction is so superficial. 

A widow, Sara, lives alone in her apartment. Her young adult son, a drug addict, occasionally goes AWOL, only to sell off his mother's goods for a bit of cash and a quick fix. The mother's constant companion is a TV, and her fixation with a particular game show keeps her going. Her only other human contact is when her neighbours sunbathe along the walkway.

One day, Sara receives a call that she will be a guest in a game show. She and her friends are all so excited. Sara plans to appear in a dashing red dress that she appeared in during her prom. For that, she goes on a diet spree and later gets prescription drugs. Sara loses weight, albeit slowly. So, she increases her dosage on her own, causing hallucinations and insomnia. She is finally institutionalised. 

Sara's son, Harry, tries to make money by reselling heroin at an inflated cost. He and his girlfriend have big plans of starting a boutique. Things do not go as planned. Harry, his girlfriend and his business partner are all heroin addicts. They decided to test out the merchandise that they sell. Things go spiralling down from then on. Harry even pimps his girlfriend to make ends meet.

A compelling story on the reality of addiction. 

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Reality TV in Hindi?

AK vs AK
Director: Vikramaditya Motwane

At first look, it looked promising. The idea was revolutionary. The layout gave the feel of reality TV, an idea that probably arose from the makers of ‘The Blair Witch Project’. This is where the camera person is not stationary but will be running with the actors, how a paparazzi would chase its prey.

The characters used their original names, and it looked like the audience would have a peek into their private lives, which they did, to a certain extent.

Trouble brews when Anil Kapoor shares the stage with Anurag Kashyap during an interview. In the course of their conversation, Anil (an actor) and Anurag (a director, mostly)  argue about whose role is crucial in the success of a movie. As they defend their respective stands, things start becoming personal. Anurag accuses Anil of being an ageing actor on his decline, while in retaliation, Anil downplays Anurag’s directorial skills and success in the film industry. It leads to a bust-up, much to the excitement of the media and the general public.

The public takes Anil Kapoor’s side. Anurag is treated like a pariah and struck off the inner circle. He is refused new projects, and the old ones are canceled. Anurag devises an elaborate plan to get himself in the limelight and rejuvenate what he perceives as Anil’s flaying career.


Anurag writes a script where Anil’s daughter is kidnapped. Whilst an irritated Anil tries to shed off the irritating Anurag, he soon realises that the whole set-up is not merely from a script but something more sinister. Anil had to rescue his daughter before sunrise, or she will die. The police cannot get involved, and he cannot get help from friends and relatives. All phone conversations must be on speaker. To top it all up, it is Christmas Eve and Anil’s birthday. He had to put up a straight face with his family. Throughout the debacle, Anurag and a camera woman were to follow Anil and tape his every move.

The movie progresses well with its meta approach to filmmaking. Although dealing with a serious subject matter, there is dark comedy all around. To keep it real, the film goes on to show performers having to kowtow to the tunes of their fans, sometimes dancing monkey acts just to keep them happy despite the inner dilemmas they were embroiled in, but it soon becomes draggy. As in most Bollywood offerings, the filmmakers also become guilty of overdramatisation. The movie ends in an unceremonious dull thud.

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A peek into the human psyche...

100 humans (Netflix, 2020)

This could be one of the series which one can skim as he undergoes house arrest during these trying times of combating Covid-19. Even though the show brags of trying to answer all of life's questions on humans and their behaviours through its social experiments, it is, by no means, cerebral. 

The Guardian labels it as one of the most worthless reality-experiment-pseudoscience show in history. Perhaps, it is a bit unkind to label it such, but some of the experiments that the show do are quite outlandish and their conclusions simplistic. 

Some of the life questions that the show asks include 'What makes Us Attractive', 'Best Age to be Alive', 'about the Battle of the Sexes', 'Biasness of Society', 'Happiness', 'Pain versus Pleasure' and 'Distrusting our Senses'.

One of the bizarre assumptions here is that the ability of a male to dance is indicative of attractiveness, hence, potentially fertile. And the fertilising ability is deduced from a seminal analysis. Someone who has the grooves on the dance is supposed to be teeming with swimmers. Of course, one does not develop two left feet once he undergoes a vasectomy. Clinically we know that sperm count is not indicative of virility. 

Besides that, there are a few interesting discussions with their guest psychologists and psychiatrists. Do uniforms make a person more desirable? Maybe a person in authority but definitely not in the lower rung of the society. Does a symmetrically balanced facial cut give one a get-out-of-jail-card free? It apparently does. And being comically funny melt hearts?

The schism between the sexes is discussed. The classic stereotyping of ladies not keeping to time is said to be debunked. The guys are, however, quite economical with their words. The graph of happiness is convexed at either end of one's lifespan. The young look at the life ahead of them of zest while the silver-haired are happy doing what they like at a leisurely pace. The concepts of fluid and crystalline memories are discussed briefly. 

Whether we like it or not, people are biased. Their opinions of people are made from a composite of the colour of their skin, their previous experiences and prejudices, gender biases and accents. (maybe religion too but it is not discussed here.)

To a certain level, we are all social animals and are prone to conform to society. Herd mentality is prevalent. 

Money makes people work harder. However, when it comes to creativity, passion supersedes financial remunerations to create that Van Gogh or Mona Lisa. Music has shown to affect our moods and even increased our boldness to take risks. The idea of a person with a surname that starts in the earlier part of the alphabet list tends to do better in life may not really true.

Overall, when you are quarantined in the house in the company of your loved ones and start questioning the purpose of your existence on Earth, this may be a precursor to the journey of self-discovery.

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Mere coincidences?

The Eyes of Darkness (1981)
Author: Dean Koontz (aka Leigh Nichols)

This book has been making its rounds recently after the current outbreak of the feared novel coronavirus Covid19. The excitement (paranoia) grew as it was mentioned that the said virus was developed as an experimental bug in a research facility in Wuhan, China. On top of that, the virus in the book is reported to have a 100% mortality rate. The hysteria reached a feverish pitch as more pictures allegedly coming out clandestinely from there dropping like flies after contracting the disease.

This story is a simple one narrating the tale of a grieving divorced young mother. She lost her son during his school trip accident. Even a year after his demise, she had not really got over him. She kept seeing him around town. Many unexplained events made her conclude that her child was somehow trying to contact her telepathically or via telekinesis. 

With her newfound love interest and a lot of help from her gifted son who is still alive in captivity,(surprise!), they discover a secret government facility and their secret experimentation with a killer bug.

There are some interesting facts about this book. The writer, a prolific one, wrote under many pseudonyms - Leigh Nichols when he wrote this 1981 novel. In the original edition, the biological agent was produced in a Russian lab, named 'Gorki-400', probably after Gorky Park in Moscow. 

There was a reprint in 2008. By the time the Iron Curtain had fallen, and it was not thrilling to put Russians as the villains. The events surrounding 1989 Tiananmen Square made China the perfect bogeyman. Hence, 'Gorki-400' became 'Wuhan-400'. The rogue scientist Ilya Poparipov became Li Chen.

People are questioning whether the mention of a biological weapon arising from Wuhan from a nearby laboratory is mere coincidence or is there something more that is present in this interplay?

There have been many instances when such a fluke event happened. Think 1912 Titanic and its disastrous maiden voyage and you have 1898 Morgan Robertson's novel 'The Wreck of Futility', renamed 'The Wreck of Titan'. The book chillingly describes many striking similarities between the ill-fated ocean liner, Titanic and the ship in the novel, Futility (a disastrous name, if you ask me). Of course, as conspiracy theorists would go, the company that managed the Titanic was running at a loss and got their inspiration to make insurance claims from this book.

Then there are Jules Verne's many classic novels - '20,000 leagues under the sea', 'Around the world in 80 days', 'In the year 2889' and 'From Earth to the Moon'. This Father of Fiction sitting in the cosy chair of the late 19th century could conjure up devices that are of highly complexed inventions. Captain Nemo had his electric submarine, which was a reality more than a century later. His other novels spoke of helicopters, hologram, newscasts, video conferencing and space suits. Can you imagine, he even mentioned solar sails for interplanetary travels, which are only theoretically possible even in this age and time?

Are these people clairvoyants? Are they endowed with some kind of extra-sensory precognition that can tap events from an alternate universe or foresee events of the future? Perhaps, like Ramanujan, mathematician extraordinaire, they just attuned their brain wavelengths to the correct frequency to pick up information from the Master Intellect that controls every nook and corner of the Universe. 

Do their works form a template for other great minds to work on a prototype or perhaps improve their ideas? 

Did Gene Roddenberry's Star Trek implant the idea of creating such designs like iPad, Flip phone, BlueTooth headset, command-obeying Siri, Flat TV panels, communication badges, hand-held Universal translators or Google Glass? Or was it is just part of human's general technological evolution? If that is the case, in no time, teleportation will be a reality. 

Hey, what do you know, successful teleportations of information on computer chips have been reported through quantum entanglement in laboratory conditions.

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Deprival Devours?

A thought flew past me as I was sitting through a lavish wedding dinner in a posh establishment recently. A doctor in the infant years of his career was proudly showcasing his catch to the world to ogle. Set with the high-brow society setting and the ambience to match, we, the mortals were given a sneak peek into the lives and times of the groom and bride through a montage of a roll of photos that was rolling during the function. We gathered that the respective families went through thick and thin, scaling the waves of obstacles to attain the comfort that they had acquired in life. 

Well and dandy, all these...

But how is a measly paid medical officer in the notoriously underpaid system of Malaysian civil service going to sustain the same type of lifestyle? Is he still going to be that dedicated doctor who will weather all kinds of resistance to put wellbeing above everything else as he chose the profession, not for the glamour but the calling? Is he going through grind those hard times dealing with difficult cases in the wee hours of the morning? Is he going to pacify his anger nerves as he treats drunks with avoidable wounds? Is he going to tell himself that it is a calling to be a physician as he slogs through the long New Year weekend as the rest of the city embroil in stuporous revelry of the Season? Will he think that his good deeds would earn plus points for his afterlife or that the divine forces throw him a bone to lead a comfortable family life? As the demands for modern living becomes more expensive, is he going to sacrifice the comforts of his early life for an epicurean one?

At a Klinik Desa, the reality.

Bordering on stereotyping and over-generalisation, it is probably going to be a ‘no-no’ to the above. Living in comfortable times deprived of the valuable lessons from the School of Hard Knocks of Life and acquisition of a degree through the back door means would hamper his tenacity to face the realm of the unknown. 

Now, whose fault is this? Are poverty and deprivation the only way to strengthen the mettle of Man? Will the comforts of life only create snowflakes much like how a sterile environment lowers one’s immunity guard?

Should medical vocation be reserved for those with aptitude only or to those with undying zest to serve despite adversities? Are these mere statements of assumptions?

I envisage the groom, ten years down the line, abandoning the real call of the profession to serve the needy of medical attention who are invariably the ones least deep-pocketed, to venture to something less demanding with better remunerations, like rubbing shoulders with bankers and financiers. At least their clients do not come with tales of melancholia and hopelessness but with tall stories of the impossible of pots of golds and pink unicorns. 

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Study of a fractured marriage

A Married Couple (Canada, 1969)
Director: Allan King

At one look, this film looks like a tutorial presentation in a class of psychology. It is shot like a documentary show. Apparently, the filming was done in the household of Billy and Antoinette Edwards who were undergoing a rough patch in their one and half years of marriage. All in all they had been a couple for more than 8 years.
This movie may not appeal to those who are looking at the silver screen as an outlet to release for their day to day woes as it is quite cerebral.
Allan King, a sort of a rebel filmmaker from Canada usually makes quirky non stereotypical flicks, even rubbing the censors on the wrong side.
It narrates the day to day life of ad-man Billy (40) and his home-maker wife Antoinette (10 years his junior). The camera moves into their living room and bedroom recording all their intimate moments as well as their tiffs. This movie must be a precursor to today's reality TV. They have a 1year old son and a dog.
The crisis in the relationship must have stemmed from the fact that Antoinette, a young girl when she met Billy, was mesmerized with his knowledge and smartness. As she grew older, he became not good enough. She could think for herself. Billy, comfortable with the role of the head of the family, bringing home the bacon and garnering respect from wife, cannot stomach his wife as equal. Hence, the squabbles over trivial matters arose.
Billy tries to mend the relationship through professional help but the  lack of sexual prowess on his part also fails to help to improve the situation.
They were almost at a stage of a trial separation but the film ends with the couple reconciling.
Unfortunately, in real life, 3 years after the release of the film, they were divorced. Antoinette went to remarry and stayed married for a very long time.