To dance to the tune of...

Dance Like a Man (1989)
Play by: Mahesh Dattani

Thanks to MEV for the introduction.

This play has been staged around the world so many times. Managed to pick up a youtube version of a play done in 2017 by the Asia Society in Hong Kong. It was the 580th show that the group had done around the world. It was made into a film in 2004.

Everyone laments that society is patriarchal in nature. Members of the female gender often complain that their desires are clipped, and the organisation is pro-male, making things easier for them to succeed in life. Ladies achieve greater heights not because of the community's push but despite their hurdles.  

Many cultures have stereotyped gender roles. Certain professions have been typecasted. Some jobs make a man less a man. Till recently, nurses were expected to be females, and male dancers were frowned upon. In this drama, we discover the difficulties a male member of an Indian family has to fulfil his lifelong ambition of becoming a successful Bharatnatyam dancer.

It is more than just that. It also explores the misperception of society that looks at Bharatnatyam dancers as glorified call-girls. It is alright to learn it as a passing phase to ensure continuity of tradition, but the buck stops there. Even for a lady, it is viewed as an inappropriate activity for married women. Society says that a married female body, a vessel for procreation, is too sacred to be ogled by everyone. In a closed knitted community where a married lady is only for the consumption of her husband, a female dancer has to find a husband who would still allow her to pursue her dance ambition after the wedding. In other words, she has to find a partner who would dance to her tune!

The title 'Dance Like a Man' got me thinking. How is it to dance like a man? Are we supposed to be less graceful? Then it struck me.

After being subjugated to all the rules and regulations meted to curb girls' activities in society, over generations, the fairer sex (may not be a 'woke' approved term) has acquired the art of survival. They have learnt how to dominate over another without the other feeling that they are overwhelmed. It is a subtle trickery they employ to get the upper hand in deciding certain things. In reality, their victims have lost their free will, without their realisation, but are remote-controlled by the master puppeteers who control the tug strings.

Indian mothers have perfected this craft. Even though they complain that Indian societies are patriarchal, in reality, they are frequently seen utilising emotional blackmails to achieve their set ambitions. Their elephantine memories of remote and obscure events can make their men 'Dance like a Man'.

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License.