The dichotomy of life

Sliding doors (1998)

The theme of the movie is one that we all ponder upon. What if we had done this that done way and done that this way, where would we be, what would we be?
This Anglo-American film looks at this topic light-heartedly in a typically British fashion, with Gwyneth Paltrow as the main character.
Helen (Paltrow) is fired from her PR job. As she returns home, we are shown two alternatives of how her life would be. In the first one, she misses the train and in the second one where she gets on the train.

In the timeline that she misses the train, Helen gets mugged, gets hurt and goes home. She listens to all the crap that her two-timing boyfriend author, Gerry, hurls at her. She slogs as a waitress while her boyfriend cheats on her. She discovers that she is pregnant but cannot tell him as he is too busy trying to cover his tracks. In an interview at Gerry's girlfriend apartment, she is told that the girlfriend is also pregnant. Helen has a fall and is admitted for a miscarriage.

Helen sees Gerry in bed with his other beau in the alternative lifeline where she catches the train. She leaves him, stays with her best friend and fancies a particular bloke James whom she bumped in her previous office elevator. Helen starts her own PR company and finds herself pregnant with Gerry's baby. She also discovers that James is married with a wife. She decides to end the relationship but relents when James clarifies that he is in the process of a divorce. Just as everything seems okay, she is hit by a speeding van and is fatally wounded.

In the final scene, Helen leaves the hospital and leaves Gerry. She drops her earring in an elevator and is picked up by James, who happened to be visiting his mother.

For a short while at the beginning of the film, it is confusing to see the two characters until one puts a plaster on her forehead and later has a haircut.

Too popcorn-like, lovey-dovey for my liking! It did not leave a permanent imprint on the cerebral cortex. It is actually a plagiarised version of a Polish movie 'Blind Chance'; you must look for that one. Just for trivia, Paltrow's first born child is named Apple. NO! Her second child is not Ball but Moses!

Above us only sky?

Osho Meditations

PRAYER

THERE is nobody to hear your prayers. Your prayer is simply a monologue; you are praying to the empty sky. Nobody is going to reward you for your prayers – remember it. If you really know what prayer is, prayer itself is its own reward. There is nobody else to reward you; the reward is not there in the future, not in the afterlife.
But praying itself is such a beautiful phenomenon that who cares about the future and who bothers about the reward? That is greed, the idea of reward. Prayer in itself is such a celebration, it brings such great joy and ecstasy, that one prays for the prayer’s sake. One does not pray out of fear and one does not pray out of greed. One prays because one enjoys it. One does not even bother whether there is a God or not.
If you enjoy dance you don’t ask whether there is a God or not. If you enjoy dance, you simply dance; whether anybody is seeing the dance from the sky or not is not your concern. Whether stars and the sun and the moon are going to reward you for your dance, you don’t care. The dance is enough of a reward unto itself. If you love singing you sing; whether anybody listens or not is not the point.

 So is prayer. It is a dance, it is a song; it is music, it is love. You enjoy it and there it is finished. Prayer is the means and prayer is the end. The end and the means are not separate – then only you know what prayer is.
When I say prayer, I mean an openness towards God. Not that you have to say something, not that you have to ask something, but just an openness, so that if He wants to give something, you are available. A
deep expectation, but with no desire – that’s what you need. Urgent expectancy – as if something is going to happen any moment. You are thrilled by the possibility of the unknown but you don’t have any desire. You don’t say that this should happen or that should not happen. Once you ask, prayer is corrupted.
When you don’t ask, when you simply remain in silence but open, ready to go anywhere, ready even to die, when you are simply in a receptivity, a passive, welcoming spirit, then prayer happens. Prayer is not something that one can do – it has nothing to do with doing. It is not an action or an activity – it is a state of mind.
If you want to talk, talk, but remember, your talk is not going to affect the existence. It will affect you, and that may be good, but prayer is not going to change God's mind. It may change you, but if it is not changing you then it is a trick. You can go on praying for years, but if it doesn’t change you, drop it, throw it, it is rubbish; don’t carry it any more.
Prayer is not going to change God. You always think that if you pray, God’s mind will change, He will be more favourable, He will be tipped a little towards your side. There is nobody who is listening to you. This vast sky cannot listen. This vast sky can be with you if you are with it – there is no other way to pray.
I also suggest to pray, but praying should be just an energy phenomenon; not a devotee-and-God phenomenon, but an energy phenomenon.

OSHO

Culture is dynamic

We are always told that we must preserve our culture and the values of our ancestors are slowly but surely eroding as we speak. What is culture anyway? It is something agreed by majority of people in a particular location to carry out things in life in a particular fashion. The diaspora of individuals from this community/ethnicity/same language are supposed to act in the same way if their geographic location differs.

I remember getting a earful of tongue wagging 'advice' from Amma for not being able to buy a comb of bananas for a particular prayer (Ponggal or something) as she had requested. It was not my fault as in that particular year in mid 70s, everybody became pious and bought up all the bananas from the shops in RRF. There was also another Chinese festival at that time. Maybe at that time, the economy was also not doing so well and divine intervention was needed. I tried to 'educate' her that it was all right to substitute it with other fruits just like our fellow Hindus in America and UK would not be able to lay their hands of banana and also that it is the thought that counts. And the Hindu epic story of how Lord Shiva accepted the aboriginal hunter, Velan's sincere offering of slaughtered meat and lighted lantern with pork lard as oil  even preferring to Brahmin priest who had laboriously and ceremoniously set the whole ceremonial offering with the regatta of prayers and purity by society's standards but with a not-so-clean judgemental superiority complexed heart! Of course, Amma was not amused and Appa had to take his bike and buy a comb of banana from town to meet the religious requirements!

We can see how culture (the way to do certain things in certain way) has permeated even into our religious beliefs. 

A wedding is the epitome of showcase of one's culture. Steps have been laid down step by step, by word of mouth, from the step of seeking potential bride/groom/victim to the ceremonious deflowering of the maiden all are done in what is considered as the auspicious times based on the positions of Saturn, Uranus,Sun and others. In the pre Revolution Age era, a wedding was indeed an occasion looked forward by friends and relatives alike for some fellowship, merry-making and setting up of other potential wedding candidates. It would go on for weeks altogether with the bride's party coughing the expenses for good measure (or curse for bearing a weaker sex). -But everything powerful on earth is associated with women, e.g. Mother Earth for compensation!

In modern times of course, all these are not possible. People now live in different structured lives. They do not share the luxury of their predecessors and work in boxed offices almost daily. The exposure via telecommunication modalities and movies to the outside world have fascinated them with other cultures that have slowly crept into theirs and have been accepted as norm.

A point of interest is the wine toasting ceremony that has become part and parcel of most wedding receptions. Sceptics will fret that indulging in intoxicants is a deviant practice alien to our civilisation. If that is the case, then even the loads of tomatoes in our favourite Indian cooking and tomato purée rice cannot be claimed to be Indian in origin. Tomato, a native of the Mediterranean land, made its way to Bharat via Arab traders even before the British and had claimed its place in Indian heartland.

Why bother by all these? Just savour the moment and enjoy it. At the end of the day, one is just left with distant memories of youth and how we were before senility sets in and its backbreaking problems starts.

A wine toasting ceremony with the masters of ceremony suggesting a toast for a blissful married life, joined by family and friends on stage at a dinner I was invited to. While looking at the world go by with my hawkish eyes, my devilish mind starts wondering and looking at perspective at things as if I were an alien looking at the antics of human!
The presentation at this reception was excellent with excellent video montage of the wedding edited and choreographed to the standards of Kollywood with proper use of relevant music track.

P/S: People of Indian diaspora are quite comfortable with hugging these days. A generation ago, eye contact and salutations with folding of hands in front of chest would signify greetings from the heart with no physical touch necessary. Culture has evolved to include an embrace to cement the bond. It is accepted as culture.

Life is a beach!*

Gone are the days when people will do anything to stay away from medical facilities for fear that some unpleasant news on their future would befall on their ears. From a therapeutic and corrective role, medical industry or rather business has metamorphosed to a preventive one. So, from the position of righting the wrong, it has started looking the wrongs in a complete pink of health person to give him the pallor of ill health - that is, after so many further expensive tests and dead ends of inconclusive results.

Michelin Man (spare tyres)

Paranoia (to the level of hypochondriasm), hunger to perform their daily duties (of acquiring wealth), fear of death and fear of litigation on the part of the providers have skyrocketed to need to have a comprehensive exhaustive full (fool) proof way of detecting a disease even before its genesis. Like mushrooms after a rain, health sanctuaries with resort like set-up have mushroomed offering membership to exclusive (richly gullible) members to guarantee peace of mind if they are willing to part with a large piece (chunk) of their dough to undergo multiple annual dubious screening procedures to detect signs of early diseases. Tests like full body imaging and respiratory function tests in an otherwise healthy individual have not shown to yield conclusive information but if someone is paying, anything can be arranged. The minuscule but real risk of idiosyncratic reaction to contrast is always overlooked. As they say, there is no such thing as a free lunch - something got to give.

On the other hand, these unnecessary interventions and business ventures have a snowball effect on others. It opens job opportunities for the menial workers, cleaners, sanitation companies, caterers, undertakers and not to mention the clinicians who are bored of looking at sick and terminal patients. The mundane mood can be replaced with rich blabbing executives rather than the depressingly poor malnourished real patients who need medical attention in the first place.

Meanwhile, the sharks with robes will saunter in with their hawk eyes looking for loopholes and maladies and capitalistic businessmen will stomp on their cigar and laugh all the way to bank with their stash of moolah and their portly paunches to flaunt their prosperity.

And the clients of the sanctuary carry on with daily activities with a certain boost of confidence that they would survive until the next appointment. In spite of listening to lectures on healthy living, they continue entertaining their guests with an unhealthy diet of nicotine, ethanol filled spirits with different hues and flavours, bodily pleasures that involve two to tango and the list of goes on...
Life is a beach so stop bitching...

* life's a beach (www.urbandictionary.com)
A smart way of saying "Life is a bitch!". Someone who has oppressed anger and fed up with life, yet at the onset wants to look normal, would use a phrase like that. Gives the connotation that the user of the phrase is very happy-go-lucky, but on closer examination one realizes that the user is going through a hard time.

"Sex, booze, rock and roll; Weed, speed and birth control; Life's a beach and then you die; so f@#% the world and let's get high"

Bridge the gap?

Affluent societies' kids take things for granted. No matter how much life experiences is imbibed upon the younger ones, it just cannot penetrate the skulls. It may just appear like bed time stories or Aesop's fables!
Asian mentality is do things fast and complete studies in the shortest time possible without flunking any papers, getting as many paper qualifications as early as possible and start earning and to pray eternally to the Money God! Who cares whether the kids earn enough life experience or enough professional qualifications with enough emotional maturity to match. Once the qualifications and money start rolling in, they believe everything will fall in place.

Now, Asians themselves are questioning this type of approach to life. Quite a vast of them are considering gap year in their year of studies especially in the late teen age. No, I am talking of people being hospitalized or incarcerated for delinquencies! I am talking about teenagers who go students' exchange programmes, to join the work force for a year or even go traveling to appreciate the splendor of God's creations.
By this way, children who have spoon fed or even Ryles' tube feeding throughout their growing years may find this exercise an eye opener to the reality of life. Only then would they realize that in order to be able to withdraw from the ATM some hard slogging joker has to deposit it and the supply is not infinite. Behind every transaction, there is always someone (or more) flogging his butt out to pulp trying to garnish the bacon that he brings home.
Being exposed to mix unguarded with regular people, break some sweat, learn from mistakes and bad judgements, hopefully the Facebook generation will come off their cyber dream and live the real analogue world!
But then, parents being parents would probably pamper the kids again to bend the rules here and there to ensure that their haplessly helpless ducklings are shunned from miseries of 'real life'. It would all go through a full 360 degrees circle and cone back to square one. They would never be allowed to blossom to the majestic swan that they always want to be.

Money brings out the demon in you!

The Treasure of Sierra Madre (1948)

Don't be fooled by the rather uninspiring title. This the legendary John Houston directed film that showcases how wealth brings out the demon in Man. It was shot exclusively in Mexico, set in turbulent times of the 20s after the Mexican Revolution when bandits were scouting the periphery and American gold diggers were on the prowl.

Dobbs is a financially challenged American seen wondering in the streets of Tampico.

Set in this background starts our story. After being cheated of his rightful wage, Dobbs (Humphrey Bogart) pairs up with a fellow worker, Curtin, and decides to go on a gold excavating expedition after overhearing an old timer, Walter, talking about his gold finding escapades. Walter warns on the danger of acquiring great wealth but the duo thought that a little wealth would not hurt, considering the dire straits they were in.

The expedition (with Dobbs, Curtin and Walter) starts in high spirits on a cordial note with Dobbs contributing wholly his lottery winnings. After a tedious search, they strike gold. At one juncture, Walter saves Dobbs from a cave-in. When the gold discovery gets handsome, suspicion set in amongst them, each watching suspiciously at the other, hiding their loot in a safe place and ever willing to draw their guns at slight agitation!

Whilst picking some supplies from a local grocer, a fourth American, Cody, follows their trail and demand to be included in their hunt for gold. The trio decide to gun him down just to be interrupted by a band of bandits. A duel ensues. The four fought gallantly but Cody succumbs to injuries. Rummaging through his pocket, they discover a touching letter from this decent man's loving wife and son.
They unanimously decided to offer a quarter of their findings to his widow.

Walter, who is pally with the locals, gets called to help to save a nearly drowned child. Having successfully saving the child, he is honoured by the locals. Leaving the remaining duo with his gold, he follows the Mexicans.

Tension builds up again between the ever-suspicious duo after they took a wrong trail. It is amazing to see how this two drinking buddies who had survived poverty and travelled through thick and thin could transcend to be at each other's neck all because of gold. Just like Walter had said earlier, "Gold has that effect on men".

Dobbs shoots Curtin. Thinking that Curtin is dead, Dobbs continues his tortuous journey. Meanwhile, Curtin crawls to the safe arms of a group of locals and is united with Walter.

Dobbs eventually reach a stream to quench his thirst but is attacked and hacked to death by outlaws. The bandits tried to sell Dobbs' donkeys and animal hides but is recognised by the buyer's assistant. The federal police is informed and swift justice is served - they dig their graves and the cops shoot them! Walter and Curtin arrived at scene to hear that the robbers had dropped their pouch of gold dust near the robbery site as they thought that it was just sand increasing the load of donkeys. The duo rush to the scene but a storm had hit the place and their merchandise had been blown all over the place! The disappointed duo go separate ways...

This movie would not excite the masses. There is no scenes of glamorous dances, pretty dresses or in fact there was no love interest except for gold! It is pure power of story that manage to put out in the open the demonic qualities of man. No other Hollywood movies with desert and sand could be more exciting!

The twisted tale of a stressed out mobster!

Getting my brains fried with overdose of the 'Sopranos the TV series' after managing to download Season 1-6. Just like a box set of DVD shows, this collection TV series is simply addictive. 'Sopranos' have been hailed as the best TV series of all time with 21 Emmys and 5 Golden Globes awards to boast.
It falls in a genre which is somewhere between the typical mafia flick and a comedy. To say categorically that it is a comedy would not serve justice to the laughs coming from the laughing machines. It definitely does not instill that 'off the edge' nail-biting gripping experience of 'The Godfather' trilogy. The series gives us the feel of being a parody of sorts looking at the psychological stresses that a typical Italian mafia would go through the lens of a series of psychiatrist-patient sessions between the protagonist Tony Soprano and Dr Melfi in a series of flashbacks. It also pokes fun at the typical paradoxical American family who does things which are generally accepted as wrong but still try to instill 'good' values in their kids! The failures and under-achievements are all blamed to their family line!
So far I have finished watching the first season of 9 episodes.
It starts with Tony Soliano having a panic attack. After exhausting medical investigations to ascertain the cause of his apparent loss of consciousness, he is referred to a shrink. Reluctantly and incognito, ensuring none of his circle of men are aware that he is psychologically unbalanced, he sees a lady psychiatrist (whom he also has erotic dreams about)!
Legitimately he is in waste disposal business in New Jersey but in real life, he disposes people who does not toe the line. He is frantically trying to find an answer to his medical condition at the same time dealing with stresses around him. Stresses come to him in many forms - a domineering and demanding mother who is forced to stay in a retirement home after she accidentally almost burnt her house down but she is still calling the shots; the run the mob with some many backstabbing subordinates; his 'incapable' uncle Junior whom he made boss but Tony has to make all his decisions; his hot-blooded assistant who thinks he is 'Scarface'; the wife who disproves his line of work but does not mind the remunerations; a smart teenage daughter who knows his activities with her own set of growing pains; a laid back teenage son whom Tony finds desperately to bond; fear that his children might know his job - as if they did not know; with his Russian young almost-teenage mistress and the authorities, of course! And there is a whole gamut unresolved issues of a young Tony growing up in a household where his father was always in and out of prison, sibling rivalry, seeing his father getting arrested by the cops and growing up with an overworked frustrated mother.

Living up to the reputation of being a mob film, there is a lot profanity hurled at each other even in something which appear like a friendly banter between friends or family members! (only rivalling 'Raging Bull' in the number and most creative usage in the four lettered word which starts with an 'F'!). I can understand why it did not make it our shores, especially when Tony Soprano's daily hang out joint being a topless pole dancing bar with graphic view of the near full Monty performers flaunting their well endowed medically enhanced assets gyrating around a pole ! With all our censors' butchering, it would have been a silent movie with jerky shots of a running cameraman!
The take home message that I got was that the Italian Americans depicted here ate, drank and behaved like hell. You can only blame so much to your genetic, upbringing, unresolved childhood issues. It may look like an escapist route to rationalisation and brooding but we all have to just grasp the situation at hand and make amends. If you are in the mob, however, it is easier said than done!
If you don't hit for them, they will hit you!


N.B. After the 2001 Twin Tower  mishap, most American shows do not depict this icon in their presentations. Some studios even cut older scenes with the icon in the background so as not rekindle bad memories. In the Sopranos' opening credit, it is shown in Tony rear view mirror.


P.S. Why is it that there must be an psychological explanation for everything we do?