You gave me breath, now let me breathe!

Why should I be subservient to you? Why should I bend over backwards to support you? I never asked to be born. I never had the choice of choosing you as my parents. If you two did not get frisky, I would probably be floating around in ethereal world gliding around as an angel or even a bumblebee.

Because of you, I am here. Because of that, you think you own me. Loaning me your DNA to use during my worldly sojourn, you think I should be forever indebted. True, you did not need to make all those sacrifices of time, energy and resources to sustain my wellbeing. But you did. Was it really out of selflessness at work or your selfish plan to forever entrap me? Or is the protective maternal hormones?

But then, you did not have to do all the things that you did to keep me alive and kicking. There is something called free will. For all the early hour awakenings and the regular sponging of my body when the fever hit the ceiling, I am eternally grateful. To make me forever trapped in your petticoat, it is blackmail.

You say my colour is no right that I look disspirited. You make me feel and convince me to be sick even though I am just tired. Also dispirited of your constant ranting. You tell to take this, do that and to eat those. Are these all not your attempt to make me inadequate to manage my own faculties? You are trying to clip my wings. 

What you do you not know is that I am nurturing my own little levitators that would lift me up far away from all these clutches of tentacles of smothering emotions of yours. Do it, Scott, beam me up!

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Caring, being sick and obligations to stay so.

Sharp Objects (HBO, 8-part miniseries; 2018)

They are there more than you think exist. How they smother you with love. They go out of their way to do things for you. Then they make you dependant on them. You think that they are indispensable. You cannot function without them by your side. You cannot make decisions. Simple decisions. They make you incapacitated. They make themselves valuable and liked. 

In the eyes of the public, they are the exemplary guardian. They have the reputation of going that extra mile to fulfil their motherly duties. They are warm and fuzzy to the general public, but to you, they are toxic. They never give you breathing space. It is either their way or the highway; one way and no other way. With their power of quick thinking, wit and charm, they win arguments. You are helpless in their presence. They brought you up that way. Your knees buckle by the mere mention of their name. You are stunted. You like it. It makes things easy. You do not have to make hard decisions. You do not grow; stuck in the ever inter-dependent quagmire of caregiver and beneficiary. 

This type of dynamics defeats the purpose of parenting. Should it be one where the parent prepares a child to seamlessly find his place in society learning after making bad decisions and mistakes?

What about the significant other? Is his presence just a figurehead to witness the whole hullabaloo? Sometimes he is just steamrolled by the ever-domineering other. Maybe he is too lethargic to fight back after years of doing so but finds it much easier to let nature take its course. He would find a reason and an avenue to look the other way!

Sometimes, one wonders whether all these are effects of affluence and empowerment. When survival is a question, and thinking of the next meal fills up most of your brain, there is no place for caring for the other. Everybody would be holding on to their dear lives. But the desire for power and domination is as old as humanity itself.

This gripping and dark miniseries tells about a city reporter who is assigned to cover the disappearance of a young girl in her hometown. The reporter, herself with problems with the bottle, self-harming and institutionalisation, has to revisit her traumatic childhood as she has to deal with a domineering mother, a sickly stepsister, a mousy step-father and the whole town of high-school mates. Set in a sleepy town of Wind Gap in Missouri, the story, over the eight episodes, narrates how she deals with the hostile small town folks, a lackadaisical police chief, an annoying mother and the painful memory of losing her younger sister in her childhood. A good one 4.5/5.

https://asok22.wixsite.com/real-lesson 

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