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The butt of civilisation


Sometimes in times of introspection, I do wonder why the contour of the posterior profile of an individual is so important that people dared to go through great lengths and life-endangering surgeries to ‘improve’ theirs to what is perceived as ‘perfect’ in the eyes of the masses.

Even though poets have described the buttocks as the equal counterpart of a person’s frontal beauty, come to think of it, it hosts orifices of some the human excrements with putrefying odours that may, in cultured settings, be considered inappropriate on polite conversations.

Seeking the perfect symmetrical contour is some people’s favourite pastime. Performing of some kind of ritualistic war dance with the gluteals is some people’s idea of arousal and enticement to exchange bodily fluids.

When exactly did this part of the human body become an object of endearment?

Science suggests that just like the nuchal ligaments which stabilise our head to our trunk, the gluteus muscles revolutionised our species to stand. About two million years ago, these group of muscles transformed us to become endurance runners who could outrun many of its predators and make them our prey instead. The gluteal muscles stabilise the trunk and help in each running stride. Hence, developed endurance running which made Man outrun other speedy occupants of the savanna. This trait made them better hunters and soon came to dominate the world. Other primates with small butt continued wandering aimlessly occupying the lower rung of the food chain.


In other words, our buttocks civilised us.

Now that our lives have become sedentary; we do not pounce or kill our dinners, our rears do not fulfil much of its duties. Perhaps due to our high caloric intake, it has now become a storage space for excess fat stores performing its incidental function as padding as we sit on our asses all day.

People are fixated on symmetry, proportion and conformance to the golden ratio. They try to apply these in all their daily dealings and get high by satisfying arbitrary cravings and imaginary standards. 


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