Mothers' Day Special

9.5.10
Another day*…Live and let live**…

My propensity for verbosity predates the time of preparation for the Part 2 of the MRCOG examinations. My mentor, VM, whom I revere for his invaluable support and guidance, is the guilty of unleashing this quality from me. He would make me talk on things totally unrelated to O&G just to train me to talk during the practical examinations, i.e. viva voce and clinical; of course talk sense not talk for the sake of talking (Malaysian colloquial slang: talk cock). He also conned me to croak to tune of ‘Let it Be’ in a Rotary Club dinner all in the name of building self confidence.

During my posting in Johor Bahru, I was fascinated listening to the BBC World Radio FM transmissions from Singapore, in particular its weekly editorials. A 15-minute rendition of some mundane topic like ‘The pros and cons of Daylight Saving Time’ was really intriguing. That got me thinking- that there are always two sides of the stories to everything in life, even something as pure as Mothers’ Day.

Mothers’ Day is joyously celebrated by mothers and people in the business community on the second Sunday in the month of May annually. Mothers naturally are overjoyed as they are glorified as the centre of attention, especially in she is a community where women are always considered a second class citizen, a burden whose opinion do not count and female infants born are considered curses. Of course it is heart warming to hear and see Rajnikanth singing praises and carrying his stroke-stricken mother to temple for cure in the movies (reel), but in real life?

Well and fine. Mothers become mothers because of nature’s unstoppable clock work of continuation of species and the society expects her to be a mother sometime in her life cycle. Of course some women are impregnated via unscrupulous man and divine intervention of Act of God through Man. I read somewhere of an immaculate conception without man as an accomplice a century ago (circa 3 AD).

True. Nature, through its progestogenic effect, has primed and prepared mothers into motherhood. While fathers sleep through the night like a log (or like a baby), mothers will be instinctively be awoken by a slight jolt or squeak of her infant even late in the night or wee slumbering hours of morning in spite of back breaking feats nurturing these brats (and possibly other brats too) in the daytime. Have we not heard of mothers running into burning houses in desperate attempts to save their offspring and instead perish in the fire themselves? Or the real live events of mothers who cannot swim drown to save their struggling toddlers? No mother would give a second thought to sacrificing their meal, appearance, entertainment, worldly pleasures or even partners to ensure their children are sufficiently prepared to sail through into adulthood. Or would they not? We generalize. (too cheesey).

Having done all these over the years and guiding them through the shark infested ocean of life, these same warm hands that rock the cradle, pulled us off the rocky roads, rock and roll to our antics may also rock families or wreck families altogether! This is especially so with domineering Indian mothers who think that their sons are still clinging on to breasts for milk and their sons have no mind of their own with just mud between the two ears and the world is out there just out pollute, manipulate and mystify their mind! Sometimes they blame it on black magic. Or are they just reminiscing their own devious mischievous earlier deeds? They expect pay back time for all the earlier sacrifices all these years. They expect royal treatment in the shadows of Cleopatra and Jhansi Rani and everyone should dance to their fancy tunes and pick their crumbs. They have no qualms about everybody else feeling miserable. They would continue doing all these without an iota of guilt but instead plead self pity through emotional blackmail. And they would seek solace, eternal peace from the Almighty after this long path of destruction by attending prayers and temple soul cleansing rituals. I think I have been watching way too many M.R. Radha and Manorama movies!

Girls are born daily, they become mothers and they die to complete the cycle of life on earth. Mothers should learn to live and let live. They should learn to let go of their sons and let him live his life. They should not stick to the dictum ‘My way or no way!’ Diplomacy is the essence of civilized living and above all common sense should prevail. Like what a not so famous guru once said, ‘Expectation only leads to disappointment but acceptance brings contentment.” He was not so famous hence nobody has heard his sayings and he was so insignificant that I cannot remember his name!

All of the above are just rumblings of a fool with artistic and writing licence. Of course, I love my mother for all her sacrifices and undying devotion. And I pray for her health and long happy life. I love you, Amma. Happy Mothers’ Day. Now, can you take the dagger off my jugular?

She broke the bread into two fragments and gave them to the children, who ate with avidity.
"She hath kept none for herself," grumbled the sergeant.
"Because she is not hungry," said a soldier.
"Because she is a mother," said the sergeant. —Victor Hugo (1802-1885)
The Hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world. --William Ross Wallace (1819-1881), U.S. Poet and Songwriter
*Another Day (1965)-written by Paul McCartney;
**Live and let die (1974)-written by Paul & Linda McCartney, Soundtrack for James Bond movie.